xXx: The Return of Xander Cage

After leaving this movie, my seventeen year old cousin told me that he had lost all respect for Vin Diesel. That got me thinking. The Iron Giant came out before he was born, Pitch Black came out the year he was born and The Fast and the Furious didn't come out much later after that (side note: that first F&F movie is the only one I like because my school camp didn't have any other movies to show us). So why did my cousin have any respect for him in the first place? Maybe Groot, I guess. Hopefully you can tell from this opening paragraph that I don't have much to say about this movie, so it's going to be a fun review for all of us.

Former government operative and extreme sport enthusiast Xander Cage (Vin Diesel) is coaxed out of retirement in order to hunt down a terrorist named Xiang (Donnie Yen) who has stolen a device that can bring satellites crashing down to the Earth. But shock horror, Xiang is actually part of the same xXx program and Xander's boss Jane Marke (Toni Collette) is the bad guy. There you go, you've just been informed of the world's most basic and predictable action movie ever. Helping Xander is the most standard group of buddies ever. Standard except for one DJ who he keeps around for the good times.

The action in this movie is the most logical thing happening. That's weird to say considering the movie starts with Diesel skiing down a gravelly hill in move that makes me question whether they understand how skis or gravel works. But then again this is the movie that has dirt bikes that whip down rivers and under waves (all in the same chase mind you). Because this is a movie that is appealing only to teenage boys, there are a lot of gratuitous girls in bikini shots, as well as a scene in which Diesel is the 'victim' of a female gangbang (I actually feel disgusted that I wrote that sentence, let alone watched it in a movie). The movie tries to even out this disgrace by adding two female action heroes, which doesn't work. Before you all go "Ruby Rose is my kween, she slays in OITNB, what are you talking about?", I have to remind you that I grew up with her being presenter on the Australian version of MTV and nothing will ever get that out of my head. In addition to all this weird portrayal of women where they're not sure if they should degrade them or make them strong, Nina Dobrev plays the cringiest character ever, someone who is geeky and shy, but unafraid of telling Xander Cage she likes rough sex and flirting with Ruby Rose. Again, this is obviously the very warped fantasy of what a woman should be like.

The moment well-respected martial artist Donnie Yen realised he needs a new agent

This movie does give me a chance to educate you a little about the industry though; namely the relationship between Hollywood and China. This year it is expected that Chinese ticket sales will surpass those of America for the first time in history. Because of this, Hollywood studios want to capitalise on that untapped market by getting their movies shown in China. Now the Chinese government only lets in a limited number of decadent Western films a year (and boy is this one decadent) and to make those chances higher, a studio can co-produce with a Chinese company. In order to do that, the filmmakers have to agree to fill a certain number of lead roles with Chinese actors. (I know that this is a deeply complex issue and I'd suggest checking out this video by Vox). What does all this have to do with our horrible movie. Well, it explains the inclusion of Chinese actors Tony Jaa, Donnie Yen and Kris Wu and also why this movie will probably do so well in that market.

xXx is an extremely subpar action movie. I know that sometimes I come of as someone who doesn't respect the genre, but I do enjoy it and know when something is trying. There was no effort whatsoever here. Gone are the extreme sports that I'm guessing the x's stand for and are replaced by a lot of standing around with arms spread wide open. And remember those character title cards that everyone thought were pointless in Suicide Squad, get ready for a lot of those.

Hector and the Search for Happiness

You would expect that a feelgood film with a title such as Hector and the Search for Happiness would result in a clichéd and totally overdone mess of a story, but Peter Chelsom's film manages to pull it off, thanks by-and-large, to a vivacious performance from Simon Pegg.

Hector (Simon Pegg) is a psychologist, troubled by the fact that he is offering advice to his patients about how to live life, without having truly experienced it himself. After somewhat of a mental breakdown, Hector decides to go on a trip, exploring the world and researching what it means to be happy. He doesn't know where he's going, or when he'll return, yet he asks his long-term girlfriend Clara (Rosamund Pike), to wait for him.

Armed with a blank notebook from Clara, and all the equipment he could possibly need, Hector travels to a variety of places including China and Africa, encountering very different people, from mothers, to prostitutes, to monks, to criminals, and asks them about what they consider happiness to be, and what personally makes them happy.

Surprisingly, the clichés that you would normally expect from this sort of film weren't particularly present in Hector, though as he travels through Asia and Africa there are definitely some strong stereotypes being played upon. I also found some elements of the plot rather obscure in meaning at times, but overall, there's plenty of funny and enjoyable moments to keep you interested. These 'moments' are great on their own but unfortunately, they don't work cohesively in the overall narrative and rather rely on the typical ending montage to link them all together.

Simon Pegg brings plenty of spirit to the part of Hector, and was certainly charismatic enough to push the film beyond the capabilities of the script. Toni Collette and Christopher Plummer were both well cast, but underused - though Plummer's small role is possibly the most interesting part of the movie - and it was good to see Jean Reno as a total badass again. However, Rosamund Pike, fresh off the heels of her fantastic performance in Gone Girl didn't bring much to the screen for me, mainly thanks to the nagging nature of her inherently uninteresting character, though this certainly isn't the worst film that she's appeared in...*cough* Die Another Day *cough*.

After the dull, grey world of Hector as a psychologist moves aside for his world travel adventures, the screen opens up to a brightly coloured series of landscape shots that highlight the outlandish experiences of his trip. It's really quite a beautiful movie, bolstered by some great acting and enjoyable scenes, unfortunately though it does succumb to a few stereotypes, and lacks a bit of substance overall.

Tammy

So I went into this movie with super low expectations. All I knew about it was that is a Melissa McCarthy vehicle where she goes on some sort of road trip. So I was a little surprised that I didn't find it all that bad. That was then I realised that it was supposed to be a comedy, it was then that I was disappointed.

Tammy (Melissa McCarthy) is a woman who is at a crossroads in her life. She has just found out that her husband is cheating on her and has been fired from her job. Fed up with everything that is going on, she goes on a road trip with her grandmother Pearl (Susan Sarandon), who wants to visit Niagara Falls. Along the way, Tammy meets Bobby (Mark Duplass), who she falls for.

Tammy is a strange movie. It's not a full on laugh out loud comedy (although there are a few laughs), but it is neither a drama. It suffers from severe under-characterisation and you never get close to any of the characters. The story isn't too bad, I can see the concept actually happen, but the situations that Tammy finds herself in are just absurd (and not in the funny way).

This film has a crisis in casting. Whilst the part of Tammy was written for McCarthy (she did write the script after all), some of the main roles are extremely poorly cast. It's hard to believe that Susan Sarandon is McCarthy's grandmother, but even harder to grasp at the idea of Allison Janney being her mother (there is only a decade difference in their ages). Toni Collette and Nat Faxon appear in this movie, although they barely have any lines. The only good choices I could pick out were Kathy Bates and Sandra Oh as a lesbian couple. These two were the sweetest and most likeable characters in the film.

The comedy relies on McCarthy being a foul-mouthed woman, which is really old hat for her (she did it better in both Bridesmaids and The Heat). She has some skill doing slapstick work, but doesn't take advantage of the opportunities and instead attempts to swear her way into some laughs.

Verdict: An alright movie if you've got a lazy afternoon to spare (like I had), but I wouldn't recommend rushing out to see it.

Blinky Bill movie? Take my money already.

So I have no idea how I hadn't heard that a Blinky Bill movie was in production, but now I've found out. And we have a cast list for the animated movie too.

For our international readers, Blinky Bill is an Australian character from a series of books and a very popular cartoon series from the early 90s. He is an anthropomorphic koala who has adventures in the bush with his other animal friends. The TV series was a staple for many kids who grew up in the 90s.

By the look of the cast, this is going to be a fun movie. Blinky will be voiced by Ryan Kwanten (True Blood) and the other cast members include Robin McLeavy (Hell On Wheels), Toni Collette (Little Miss Sunshine), Rufus Sewell (Hercules), David Wenham (The Lord Of The Rings), Richard Roxburgh, Deborah Mailman, Barry Humphries and Barry Otto.

From that cast and the source material of the film, they can take my money already.

The Way, Way Back

I'm just going to get straight to the point, this is one of the best films I've ever seen. I'm going to have to go back and amend my top ten list. Written and directed by Academy Award winners Jim Rash and Nat Faxon (Best Adapted Screenplay for The Descendants, 2011), it is probably the best comedy that I have ever seen.

14-year-old Duncan (Liam James) is on summer holiday to his mother's boyfriend's, Trent (Steve Carell), beach house in a sleepy East Coast town. His mother, Pam (Toni Collette), is hoping that the two bond over the summer. Duncan soon becomes frustrated with Trent's cold attitude towards him and adventures to the nearby water park. He is offered a job by the owner, Owen (Sam Rockwell), and soon becomes the hero of the staff.

Duncan has a budding relationship with his neighbour, Susanna (AnnaSophia Robb), whilst his mother's relationship is slowly fading.

This film is an excellent example of character driven comedy. All the characters are fully formed and lead the story in their own ways. Both Faxon (Freeloaders) and Rash (Community) are master writers and although I haven't seen The Descendants I can see that they are great writers, as well as directors. They also play two of the water park's employees and prove that they can achieve a high level of excellence in all fields.

The cast of this movie is amazing. Liam James is a newcomer to main roles in film, but carries the role amazingly. He plays his character so amazingly and the development that he goes through is out in front and fantastic. I expect that we'll be seeing a lot more of him.

Steve Carell (Anchorman) plays against type and goes for a serious role this time. He is entirely believable as the douchebag boyfriend and from the opening scene onward you will hate him. And that's the mark of a fantastic actor.

AnnaSophia Robb (Soul Surfer) is incredible as the girl next door and does play the character in the stereotypical way. Likewise, Sam Rockwell (Moon) is uplifting as Owen and you can really see the connection that he has with Duncan.

I laughed the hardest at Allison Janney (the mum from Juno), who plays Susanna's mother. She is perpetually drunk and is constantly saying inappropriate things to her friends and even her own children, but I can see her as a good mother.

Verdict: A perfect movie. I saw it with a large, varied group and everyone loved it. I would highly recommend it to anyone who loves movies and it has a great uplifting message.

Hitchcock

I am convinced that someone has built and is using a time machine. My evidence for this wild allegation is the movie Hitchcock. They must have gone back to 1960 and convinced Alfred Hitchcock to get in some odd shaped car and act in a film about the making of his most famous movie Psycho. It's either that or Anthony Hopkins is the best celebrity impersonator ever (or close enough until you hear the legendary Ralph Garman). Either of these ideas work for me.

The story behind Psycho was an amazing one. His last film North by Northwest was a huge success. But Alfred dreams of his younger days, when he and his wife Alma (Helen Mirren) were making experimental movies and pushing the boundaries of can and can't be shown on the silver screen. He is under contract for one more picture with Paramount. So in the search for the inspiration for his next movie, Hitchcock comes across Robert Bloch's novel Psycho. It is about the owner of a mysterious motel who murders most of the young female guests who enters it's doors. Hitch, as he is known in this movie, is smitten with the story, he has found the film that will push the envelope in many ways. However, he cannot get anyone to finance it. So, in a turn that makes me to consider him one of the original indie filmmakers, he mortgages his house and tightens his bootstraps to make one of the most ambitious films of his career. Ambitious only because the head of the US censor board (That 70s Show's Kurtwood Smith) finds the film to be abhorrent. So through the ups and downs of the production he finally is able to make a rough cut that is satisfactory, although it isn't any good.

Meanwhile, Alma finds herself drifting away from Alfred and wishes to pursue her own projects. She starts work on an adaption of her friends new novel. She works on this for a considerable amount of time before realising it is unadaptable. This is just about the time when Hitch finds that he needs to re-edit his rough cut and Alma comes to the rescue. They spend a considerable amount of time in the editing room and end up coming out with a masterpiece. This time round the film is much more to Hitch's expectations, although only two theatres agree to show it, so they must rely on word of mouth. Luckily for them it is a success with the audience.

The cast in this movie is great. Anthony Hopkins, as I said earlier was a dead ringer for the master of suspense, and Helen Mirren were perfect as always. But they real joy of the cast is in the supporting roles. Scarlett Johansson is perfect as Janet Leigh (also known as Jamie Lee Curtis' mum, something I only recently discovered), the leading lady made famous by the iconic shower scene. Another doppelganger in this movie was James D'Arcy as Anthony Perkins, who plays the eponymous psycho. This guy was so convincing as Perkins, he had all the nervousness of the actor and character down-pat. Also a surprising supporting role came from a highly unrecognisable Toni Collette as Hitch's assistant. Jessica Biel also gets a bit part as Vera Miles, Hitch's former leading lady.

There are some interesting "dream" sequences in which Hitch's experience making this film is likened to that of the story Ed Gein, the serial killer caught two years prior to the making of the film and the model behind the character of Norman Bates. Here his played by Michael Wincott (we all remember him from Alien: Resurrection, surely).

Verdict: I found this movie to wonderfully enjoyable. I love Psycho and I find it to be terrifying (it's 52 years old as well). I also like to see movies about how Hollywood worked in it's golden age and this is no exception. Look out for a great reference to his next film, The Birds.