Mark Reviews: Ted 2

Hey guys, I'm really pissed off. You know why? Because they said my friend Ted wasn't a human and that he isn't allowed to have kids. Why is that you guys? Have you seen how many beers he can drink? There are guys back in Dorchester who would be passed out and he would still be going. And those guys have Irish parents too.

Well, the whole reason we found out that was he wasn't allowed to have kids was because we snuck into All American hero Tom Brady's house to steal his sperm for Ted to have a kid (that's a whole other story and I don't want Ma to read about me breaking into houses because I don't do that anymore to be a good example for Donnie). But, hey, Ted you don't need some football player when your best friend is right here and he's better than any football player. Hell, I'll even play football if you want.

Okay, so maybe that's a photo of me throwing a football at the back of Donnie's head, but it still counts as being an athletic guy. Anyway, I got your back Ted. Your babies will be strong. But hey, what about my troubles? My character's wife left me, so I gotta get back in the game. Luckily, Amanda Seyfried plays a hot young lawyer, so there's always that option.

If you're gonna see any of my movies this year, just make sure it's this one. I had so much fun making it. And if you don't like me, it's an opportunity to see me get covered in semen.

Selma

Ava DuVernay's latest film Selma is probably one of the best movies about the Civil Rights movement of the 60s and probably the most honest in its portrayal of the brutality suffered by African-Americans in the South at this time. It also shows the outright racism that was accepted at the time and even leaders like Governor George Wallace doing nothing to stop it.

After receiving the Nobel Peace Prize, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. (David Oyelowo) returns to his home in Atlanta, Georgia to find the next step in his Civil Rights movement. He finds it in the town of Selma in Alabama, where black people are still unable to register to vote, despite legally being able to. King is joined by fellow members of the Southern Christian Leadership Conference (SCLC) to tackle this issue. Meanwhile, President Lyndon B. Johnson (Tom Wilkinson) is nervous about about the tension King being in Alabama is having with racist governor George Wallace (Tim Roth). King and his followers eventually decide to walk from Selma to Montgomery as a peaceful protest.

DuVernay's film is masterfully created and captures the feeling of the time perfectly. Martin Luther King is such an important figure of the twentieth century and it's movies like this one that help expose certain parts of history to mainstream audiences. One problem I do have (and it's only minor), is that the film overuses brutal violence to get it's point across. Whilst it's not absolutely excessive I felt like you could maybe cut out one or two scenes of this and still get the point across about how terrifying it was to live as a black person during these times.

This movie has a huge cast and all of the performances are so amazing. David Oyelowo is so amazing as King that I forgot about all other movies he had been in and could only focus on him. It is so disappointing that he is not up for Best Actor for this movie because I would have chosen him in an instant. While President Johnson's portrayal is slightly inaccurate (he championed the Civil Rights movement and was not against it), Wilkinson brings his talents to the fore and is wonderfully followed round by Giovanni Ribisi.

Carmen Ojogo is superb as King's weary wife and Oprah Winfrey makes a superb cameo as a woman who just wants to vote and demonstrates a mean right hook. Tim Roth made my skin absolutely crawl as George Wallace, but also backs up his ability as a great dramatic actor. Stephen Root is just as despicable as Major Al Lingo who orchestrated some of the more brutal attacks on the peaceful protestors.

Selma is deserving of all the praise it has received. It isn't just an affirmative action film because it justifies the reasons for the Civil Rights movement. Ava DuVernay and David Oyelowo make a superb team and are supported by a fantastic cast.

A Million Ways to Die in the West

There does certainly seem to be a million ways to die in the west, as we constantly being told by Seth MacFarlane's Albert Stark. It's as if he needs to remind the audience of this every five minutes, as though we have forgotten the title of the film we bought a ticket to see. It seems as though MacFarlane has invested a lot in this movie, having written, directed, produced and starred in it, and while it's not entirely unfunny, it isn't quite hilarious the entire way through.

But what more can we expect from the man who created Family Guy. Now I don't want everyone to jump to conclusions and accuse me of hating Family Guy (I do love it), but it is a show known for not being consistently funny. The majority of the jokes in the film are lavatorial in manner and that did appeal to the 10 year old in me, but the jokes that referenced classic western comedies appealed to the film nerd in me.

And there are plenty of references to these comedies. Films like Back to the Future: Part III, Django Unchained and the original western spoof Blazing Saddles are all referenced and done well. I even spotted a homage to probably the best western ever made, The Searchers.

One thing I found slightly distracting was the use of modern slang. Now while I can understand using the f-word (I mean Deadwood used much worse words on a regular basis), some of the language seemed out of place. It was almost like there was a deleted scene at the start in which Stark used a time machine to get back to the old west.

There are a lot of fantastic actors in this film as well. It's a shame they are all underused compared with the role MacFarlane has given himself. Charlize Theron and Liam Neeson are both extremely talented actors and are just used as scenery in scenes with MacFarlane. There are a lot of great cameos, including Gilbert Gottfried, Ryan Reynolds and Ewan McGregor. Bill Maher also does a western themed stand up set.

Verdict: Funny, but I feel as though MacFarlane could share around some of the bigger jokes to his co-stars to make a better film.

Gangster Squad

Gangster movies have long been a staple of my movie diet. Since a young age I have enjoyed movies such as Goodfellas, Scarface, Reservoir Dogs and countless other crime flicks. I have always been drawn in by the glamour of the lives that these men lead, but I have also taken away the message of these movies, that although you may have a great life it never ends well. And boy, doesn't it end badly for Mickey Cohen, the main bad guy in Gangster Squad. It seems to me that whenever a something is set in 1940s LA, the go to bad guy is Mickey Cohen. He has been featured in everything from film, books and even video games.

Gangster Squad is the story behind the crusade to bring down real life LA kingpin Cohen, played perfectly and ruthlessly by a stellar Sean Penn. Josh Brolin's John O'Mara is charged to put together an outfit to bring down Cohen, who's been running LA for years. The team is quickly assembled and they have to work outside the law to bring down Cohen, because he has most of LA's cops in his pocket. They destroy racket after racket to flush out Cohen, which eventuates in a classic hotel shootout, but it is one we have seen a million times.

Josh Brolin is excellent as the crusading cop and this is the first movie that I've seen with him since the Coen Brother's True Grit, but the stars that everyone has come to see in this are Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone. It's no secret that I am in love with Emma Stone, every guy who has seen her feels the same way, but her casting in this feels like nothing more than a marketing ploy. Everyone loved her and  Gosling in Crazy, Stupid, Love, but she didn't get enough screen time for me to make a meaningful connection to the character and although she's no ditzy blonde, she seemed like she was only there as motivation for Gosling's character. Although I am a huge fan of Ryan Gosling (he should have won some award for Drive and I am immensely looking forward to The Place Beyond The Pines), he seems like he should stick to being the indie hero that he is. When he stars in these big budget movies I feel as though he doesn't get to be the actor that he can be when you see him in indie films.

Sean Penn's Cohen reminded me a lot of the character he played in Colors and although he played a rookie cop in gangland LA in that one, I couldn't help getting the feeling that he was channeling the motivations he had as that character all those years ago. Of course the real life Cohen didn't share the same fate as Sean Penn did in this movie. Like many of those gangsters all that time ago, he was put away for tax evasion.

For me the real star of this movie was the city of LA. Ruben Fleischer (the director) put together a stunning recreation of the city in the 40s. Now I have to say I am a huge fan of this time period. It was the golden age of Hollywood, jazz music was on the rise, art deco was what everyone wanted. This movie really does do that justice.

Ruben Fleischer, however, maybe wasn't the best choice of director. His previous two films were Zombieland and 30 Minutes or Less, two comedies that both featured Jessie Eisenberg. They are both hilarious movies and this film is by no means a comedy. There was a few jokes early on that were played highly upon, but I felt that they weren't all that necessary.

The action in this movie is stylised and you could read how most of the gunfights were going to play out on their predetermined course. The car chase in the old Cadillacs was a highlight though.

Verdict: This movie is full of the same old cliches and archetypes of the 40s LA gangster film. There were some good performances and the city looked amazing, but in the end it was a film that I won't stick with me too long.