Collateral Beauty

Collateral Beauty is the sort of film that requires a more in depth review to explain just how appalling it really is. This review contains spoilers.

Are you one of the poor souls that went to see the infamous Movie 43? A film with an incredible array of stars, magnificently poor writing and a horrendous sense of direction that left everybody wondering how it was ever funded. Collateral Beauty has been similarly shot down by reviewers, and whilst the obvious comparisons to the aforementioned disaster might be unfitting, the minor glimpses of potential are far overshadowed by the fact that Collateral Beauty gets worse and worse at every turn.

Howard Inlet (Will Smith) is a successful advertising executive who falls apart after the harrowing death of his six-year-old daughter. Depressed, contemplating death, and worst of all, under performing at work, Howard’s concerned “friends” (Edward Norton, Kate Winslet, Michael Peña) worry in supposed equal measure for Howard’s mental state, and the state of their own professional futures. The trio hire an investigator, Sally Price (Ann Dowd) to acquire evidence that would allow them to take control of the company from Howard (with his best interests in mind of course), and they soon find out that he is writing letters to Love, Death and Time – three constructs that he once used in his advertising work and is now blaming for the death of his daughter. With all obvious options ignored, Howard’s “friends” hire three actors (Helen Mirren, Keira Knightley and Jacob Latimore) to each approach him pretending to be one of the constructs, hoping that he will have a public outburst whilst their PI is filming so that they can then - after digitally removing the actors - show it to the board to prove that Howard is unfit to run the company.

*Oh the humanity*

Written by Allan Loeb (Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps, 21) and directed by David Frankel (The Devil Wears Prada, Marley & Me), Collateral Beauty had enough capability behind it to produce at least a half-decent film, but somewhere between the ethically-barren plotline and the kindergarten dialogue, the film collapses into a hilarious smoldering pile of Hollywood farce. The story in full is as unbelievable as it is in summary - a gently sickening ride through saccharine and syrupy messages, superficial plot twists and an array of A-listers trying to act their way out of one of the worst dramatic scripts in recent memory. One horrendous issue is the dialogue, which is more literary abomination than uplifting quotage - when you have Dame Helen Mirren spitting out lines like “Nothing is ever really dead if you look at it right” surely it must be obvious that you’ve created a steaming pile of script.

Putting aside the fact that none of the characters other than Howard are even remotely able to draw empathy from the audience because of their involvement in the repulsive scheme, we also have to sit through the hilariously-poor establishing of these token issues that each of them are struggling with. Norton’s Whit is drifting further apart from his daughter, Winslet’s Claire is running out of time to have a child, and Peña’s Simon is dying - we’re all dying Simon, but you decided to die an arsehole, so I don’t care. The acting is mediocre across the board, particularly when you consider the talent on screen, but the material is so atrociously bad that there’s hardly room for improvement. Will Smith’s is the only half-decent performance, but that’s mainly because he doesn’t have to talk.

There’s a swath of other annoying issues throughout like the fact that the investigator is “secretly” filming in the background with her phone in portrait mode, but when they show the footage to the board it’s in landscape and clearly shot with a cinema camera, or the hilariously stupid idea that they could simply digitally remove the actors without an expensive composite artist. Then when they show it to the board they acknowledge the fact that they’ve hired the actors anyway. What was the actual point of it then? I could go on, if not for the inevitable brain hemorrhage that analysing this excrement would give me.

Somewhere deep in the heart of this film there was a tinge of potential, completely lost in the overblown lunacy of this attempted storytelling. In the end though, watching Collateral Beauty is a bit like pondering how quickly your life is flying by, your crippling debt, the irreparable damage we’ve done to the environment, total nuclear annihilation, the futility of existence, the end of time, a Trump presidency; the more you think about it, the worse it gets.

Suicide Squad

This may have been the most difficult review I've written to date. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, almost everyone would have by now seen the initial reviews of Suicide Squad, most of which seem to be taking the Worst Heroes Ever tagline into the Worst Film Ever territory. With all the negative chatter going on around this film, I wanted to add a more comprehensive and maybe slightly lighter review to the pile as someone who has been looking forward to this film since its inception. Unpopular opinions may appear below.

Suicide Squad, headed by an A-List cast including Will Smith, Jared Leto, Cara Delevingne and Viola Davis (also including Aussie talents Margot Robbie and Jai Courtney), brings together the wacky and weird in the continuation of the slow-to-get-on-its-feet DC Film Universe.  After the events of Batman V Superman, Amanda Waller (Davis) presents the US Government with an important and frightening conundrum: What if a being such as Superman, a being with unlimited power and superiority, decided to destroy the world without warning? Who on our planet could possibly be strong enough to stop them? Enter Task Force X, otherwise known as the Suicide Squad, a ragtag group of criminals each with their own unique and terrifying abilities, thrown together with the promise of time off their sentences if they cooperate and providing the Government with the perfect scapegoat if they fail. Faced with the constant threat of imminent death, the team (under the watchful eye of their reluctant leader Commander Rick Flag a.k.a. Joel Kinnaman) must join together to stop a force more powerful than any of them could ever imagine, and perhaps wreak a little havoc along the way.

The positives: Call me a fangirl, but this film was just fun to watch. These characters, each positively insane in their own ways, are very entertaining and work really well together on screen. Its clear that the (supposed) emotional turmoil director David Ayer put the cast through paid off, as all the characters had great chemistry with each other and were as believable as a bunch of off kilter teammates can be. Standouts however had to be Robbie’s Harley Quinn (no surprises there, most people already loved her in the trailers) who delivers the right amount of instability with equal parts charm and class, and Smith’s Deadshot, who is surprisingly one of the most humanising characters and starts to become an anchor for the group. As well as the pair, Davis' Amanda Waller was both sadistic and entertaining as well, bringing her all to the table and making us all question which side we're really on. The biggest surprise here had to be Jai Courtney’s ‘Captain Boomerang’: I’m not sure if I’m biased because I’m an Australian, but I really resonated with his character and enjoyed that mannerisms and blunt Australian humour. As well as this, the action sequences were a visual eyeful and gave each character their fighting moment to shine.

The negatives: The main issue with this film (and this seems to be a reoccurring issue with films lately) is once again, the pacing. Whereas Man of Steel and Batman V Superman were far too slow in the narrative structure making them feel like films that seemed to go nowhere, this film is equally as choppy and badly edited, making it feel as though its trying to go everywhere at once. Its understandable that with such a vast array of characters the issue of giving everyone equal weight in the film can be tricky, however I thought this was an issue that may have been resolved by the re-shoots done before its release. While the story was fun to see play out, it wasn’t the best that could’ve been done for such a rich and engaging subject matter as the Squad. As well as this, I can’t write a review without mentioning DC’s new Joker: if you’re thinking this is a Joker-centred film, you’re off by a long shot. His presence in the film is limited, playing more of a wildcard who throws a spanner in the works rather than a central character. While I enjoyed Jared Leto’s performance as a step away from previous Jokers (the idea of the Joker as a mob boss figure in underground Gotham hence Batsy’s vendetta against him refreshes the character), his performance wasn’t groundbreaking enough to warrant all the pre-film behaviour that went on, such as sending the cast dead hogs and (apparently) peeing into Will Smith’s breakfast. I can understand method acting, and I would've understood if the performance was Oscar-worthy, but the shenanigans just don't match the performance. Maybe this is because a lot of his performance was cut out? We'll just have to wait and see.

Although this film has a lot of negatives and needs some work, you can’t ignore the fact that this film has heart and is a fun ride from start to finish. The characters are entertaining, the acting from the big names is believable and enjoyable, and the characterisation makes logical sense (unlike some of the previous DC films released, looking at you Batman V Superman). As a side note, the soundtrack is also excellent. Is it the best film in existence? No. Could you play a drinking game involving this film and the phrase ‘We’re the bad guys/We’re bad guys’? Yes. But overall, its one of those films that you’ll either love, hate, or love to hate. It’s not the Suicide Squad film we deserve, but maybe it’s the one we need right now, and the good news is it’s a step in the right direction for the future of DC. 

Focus

Will Smith's character in this movie is constantly telling everyone to not lose focus when they are pulling a con, but he is constantly ignoring his own advice. When watching a movie about con artists, you don't want to lose focus and keep up with what's going on all the time, but even if you are a seasoned vet when it comes to watching these things and you think you know what's going on, clever writing will always throw you for a loop.

This movie begins with the longest prologue to a film I have ever seen (it goes for almost half the film), where veteran conman Nicky (Smith) comes across Jess (Margot Robbie), who, despite throwing the most obvious con that every sucker knows by know and fails miserably at it, impresses Nicky so much that he decides to bring her into his crew. After a series of small cons (and one big one), Nicky cuts Jess loose because it doesn't help to get tied up in the game. Three years later, Nicky is working for Garriga (Rodrigo Santoro), a Formula 1 race car owner who wants him to misdirect his rival teams to get an advantage at the Buenos Aires Grand Prix. But when Jess turns up saying she is Garriga's girlfriend, Nicky starts to lose focus.

The script is the strongest and weakest part of this film. The cons are perfectly written and fun when they are pulled off (just as they are in any film of this nature). There is a certain satisfaction in being in on how misdirection is being used against other people, like if you were the only other person in the room who knew how a magician was about to pull off an illusion. Again there are times that you don't know how something is going to end up, but being happy and relieved when everything goes to plan. I also thought that I was going to be able to pick the climax of the film, but found that I was off by just a small margin (if a con movie can con a con man, then it's good writing). 

But the script also shows weakness. The whole romantic subplot between Nicky and Jess is such a stretch. I know that they are trying to go for mass appeal, but people can enjoy a single focus film. Also the film uses a lot of confidence terminology that might fly over most audience's heads. Hopefully everyone will know that a "mark" is a target, but when you get down to shills, salting and the like, it can get a bit fast and loose.

It's a shame as well that most of the enjoyment in the film comes from the supporting cast. Robbie and Smith are just treading the boards and saying their lines at the right point and not really offering much aside from that. Adrian Martinez and Brennan Brown, who both play members of Nicky's crew, are so good that you know that when they come on screen there is bound to be some laughs. The same is said of BD Wong's Liyuan, one of their early marks, he plays such a fun character that is unlike most of the roles he takes. Rodrigo Santoro serves amiably as the antagonist of the piece.

If you can look past the wooden leads or poor romantic undertones, Focus is a pretty solid con artist movie that will keep you guessing. While it may not be as cool as something like Oceans Eleven (and it's trying so hard to be that, if only you gave it a chance), it does have some fun schemes that are good to watch unfold.

Annie

              Stacks: "I've learned you can count the people who truly love you on one hand."
              Annie: "You know you're making a fist, right."

What is Annie? It's a modernised update of the classic stage musical, made for the children of 2014. Set in New York City, specifically Harlem. The race of the leads are inverted to, along with excessive producer credits that include two hip-hop stars (Will Smith and Jay-Z) and Jada Pinkett-Smith, give the impression that this movie has the appeal and feel of a Tyler Perry or Oprah Winfrey production, or one of those Ja-Rule movies (a.k.a often bad and intended for black audiences only). With a script by the writers of Friends with Benefits, Morning Glory, 27 Dresses, We Bought a Zoo, Fired Up! and The Michael J. Fox Show. Directed by the man who directed Fired Up!, Friends with Benefits, Easy A and was the creator/executive producer of the Michael J. Fox show. And with a trailer for such a film it's hard not to walk in to this childless and not be full of a passionate, frothing hatred and the expectation to be delighted by the shoddyness on-screen. But like the titular little "foster care kid", Annie is not as awfully annoying as it would seem.

In Harlem, the precocious and eponymous orphan (Quvenzhane Wallis) lives with four other "foster care" children, waiting and wishing to be adopted and saved from the hammy Cruella-DeVille-ing of Cameron Diaz's Miss Hannigan, an alcoholic and abusive spinster who denigrates the chirpy young girls, and occasionally drunkenly smacks their heads into walls. Annie visits the same restaurant every Friday night as it is the only clue to her patronage, but otherwise spends her time at school, running about the neighbourhood, or cleaning her foster home. While trying to protect a Shiba Inu doge from some boys who are throwing cans at it, she is saved from a speeding van by billionaire mobile phone mogul Will Stacks (Jamie Foxx). Stacks is in the middle of a mayoral election campaign, but losing to a man who talks about being pissed on during a kids film ("Don't pee in my ear and tell me it's hot rain"). So Stacks, his British assistant Grace (Rose Byrne) and fast-talking money-loving adviser Guy (Bobby Canavale) intend to exploit the humanity the young girl gives him to win votes, and he soon invites her to live with him for a while. During her stay the two bond and learn off of each other, most often Stacks learning that there is more to life than hard work and business.

Annie has a certain precocious charm to it, though this is surrounded by discussions of political campaigns, phone mechanics, wildly inappropriate jokes about prostitution, alcoholism and abandonment, and such inexplicable marginalisation of real issues such as alcoholism, domestic abuse, abandonment and repression that its baffling to see these details even present in what is intended to be a sweet childrens musical, let alone being mocked. There's also many references to actors and pop culture that's fine for older audiences, including a Young Adult film-adaptation parody featuring Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis and a political ad featuring Michael J. Fox. You know, jokes for children. Chuck in a  Deliverance joke while you're at it.

"No, thanks. I don't want....companionship. Not that I'm judging!"
Literally a line of dialogue in this childrens film.

Quvezhane Wallis is undeniably great in the lead role. She's smart-mouthed, but innocent enough to be completely endearing, and possibly the best thing to say about the film as a whole. Jamie Foxx is serviceable, Rose Byrne is Rose Byrne (solid and sweet), but the hammyness of Bobby Canavale and Cameron Diaz meanders between entertaining and cringe-worthy, and often distracts. Visually, the film is bubbly and bright, but otherwise unremarkable. The musical side of the film is presented as self-aware, during several songs characters often react with bemusement, astonishment and/or scorn when others launch into song, but this just invites the wish for more confused reaction shots of bystanders during these musical numbers. The songs themselves are apparently mildly updated versions from the stage-play, with some being dropped completely to meet pacing and narrative requirements. Also, the occasional remixing of a song can be pretty startling (Foxx's rendition of "The City's Yours" featuring an interminable R&B backing). The film certainly falters in the third act,  devolving into tying loose ends where character arcs should be, and a boring chase involving Twitter and Instagram. It actually makes you miss the archetypal end of second act break-up moment that appears in most childrens films, which is followed by a sweeping crescendo of a reunion. But hey, it's a hard knock life.

Annie is not a cinematic movie, but will be an enjoyable enough DVD to pop on for the kids on a lazy weekend. None of the songs will stick, and neither will the performances outside of Diaz, Canavale and especially Wallis. Not as bad as it deserves to be, but nothing work making a fuss over, really.

Let's take a look at the Suicide Squad cast

I know that the casting of Suicide Squad isn't exactly news, DC Entertainment has been slowly releasing the news of who is going to be in the movie steadily over the past few weeks, but I thought that now we have a fair few names attached to the movie, it would be a good opportunity to talk about the movie as a whole.

I can imagine a fair few of you are probably thinking who or what is the Suicide Squad. This group is made up of super-villains from the DC universe who are made to do missions by the government that the regular superheroes won't do, mainly because they involve killing dictators, terrorists, drug barons or any similar bad guy. I also say they are made to do this because if they don't achieve their directives, they are killed by an explosive bracelet on their wrists.

This team is made up of some members who may seem familiar and others that sound like I'm just making them up. But let's have a look. First is someone who everyone should know due to her popularity. Harley Quinn (AKA the Joker's girlfriend) is going to be played by Aussie actress Margot Robbie, known for her lead role in The Wolf of Wall Street. Harley Quinn is a beloved character and it will be interesting to see Robbie's interpretation.

Next on the list is the assassin Deadshot, a frequent enemy of Batman and is known to never miss one of his targets. He will be played by Will Smith, a choice that is strange for his famous face as Deadshot's face remains covered in bandages.

Aussie actor Jai Courtney will play Captain Boomerang which is good because we wouldn't want to see an American playing an Australian character. Captain Boomerang is known for using a vast array of deadly boomerangs, much in the same way Hawkeye from The Avengers uses different arrows. I am really excited about the roles that Courtney has been doing of late and I know this will be a good one for him.

Tom Hardy will play the operational leader of the Suicide Squad, Rick Flag. As far as I can tell Flag is just a mentally unstable soldier, but watching Tom Hardy in a role like this should be fun. Model turned actress Cara Delevingne will play the witch of the group, Enchantress.

Jared Leto has been cast to play the Joker, which could be a good or bad thing, I'm not sure. I'm also not sure of how this will play into the plot. The Joker isn't a member of the team and could possibly be a target of the Squad.

Now we get into rumour territory. Apparently Oprah Winfrey's name has been put out there to play the leader of the group, Amanda Waller. I think it would be a lot of fun to see Oprah in a movie like this, rather than the ultra-serious roles that she normally plays. Another name that has been thrown into the mix is Jesse Eisenberg as Lex Luthor, but I'm not sure what to think of that.

After Earth

Just when you thought Will Smith's career had gotten back on track with MiB III, he hits you with a really bad movie. And this time it's not M. Night Shyamalan's fault.

Sometime in the future, Earth has become inhabitable for reasons unknown and the human species sets up a colony on Nova Prime. For some reason there are aliens that smell fear or something, so an army of "rangers" are established. Cypher Raige (Will Smith) is the leader of this supposed peacekeeping army and he has just come home from a long stretch of fighting. His son, Kitai (Jaden Smith), is feeling somewhat sad and his father decides to take him with Kitai to his next posting (supposedly his last). Their ship crashes on the wastes of Earth and Kitai must save them by recovering the emergency beacon in the tail wreckage of their ship.

This movie is so bad, I got bored pretty early and started reading about the production of the film instead. Apparently it was supposed to take place in a modern setting and Will Smith was supposed to take his son on a camping trip, but they have a massive car crash. So basically, the same movie but marginally better. Then Will Smith thought he could make more money by setting the film in space, especially when the opportunity of cross-platform franchising comes up (basically more money).

I should point out the people who financed this movie: Will Smith, Jada Pinkett-Smith and Caleeb Pinkett (see the pattern). All that for one kid. Who can't act. I am of course talking about Jaden Smith. I'm guessing every producer and director in Hollywood saw that this kid can't act and rejected him, so his parents made him a $130 million movie and hired a director who has made a good movie since 2000 (Unbreakable was a good flick, no matter what anybody says).

But we can't blame all this on M. Night. He didn't even get to put his Shyamalanian twist ending on it. Apparently the only directing he did was telling the cameraman where to point the camera. Smith directed both his son and himself. The other actor's in the film kind of wander around aimlessly. The only good acting came from the only female actors, Sophie Okonedo and Zoe Kravitz (daughter of Lenny).

Verdict: If you want post-apocalyptic Earth, go watch Oblivion. But if you're at that stage, just watch WALL-E instead. Also if Will Smith treats his kid like this in real life, that's one messed up family.