Thursday, 4 June 2015

Mark Reviews: Entourage

Hey guys, guess who's back? It's your favorite movie star, Mark Wahlberg. This time I'm gonna tell about a movie I made based on one of my hit TV shows. Not Wahlburgers, you dummies, that's a reality show about my family restaurant, because we had to get Donnie a nice and easy job flipping burgers (but seriously, go support the business, I promise Donnie won't drop the burger). I mean Entourage. Yeah, I bet you didn't know that show was mine, but it was based on my life when I first came to Hollywood.

So in this movie I, I mean the the character Vince (Adrian Grenier), but basically me, am a big movie star and I get the chance to direct my own big budget movie star. Along with me, my friends Eric (Kevin Connelly) and Turtle (Jerry Ferrara) are of enjoying the high life in LA, as well as my brother Drama (Kevin Dillon), but we all know that this is just Donnie and we know he won't be as famous as me. Ever. Oh yeah and my agent Ari Gold (Jeremy Piven), he's the head of a movie studio now.

Yeah, it's pretty fun making a movie about me, because I can say what can and can't go in it. So if I want to have a gratuitous amount of nudity in the movie I can because guess what? I had double-D's in my face all day when I was younger, because I was a rapper and you know what else? This young guy right here had an entourage and more money than you will ever have in your life.

You know how much I made just to do that photoshoot? $2 million. Sure, it may not be a lot now, but now I make 15 million just for walking out of my mansion. All the parties and all the action that happens in this movie happened to me. Except for the directing part. Who would ever direct a movie? That's way too much work.

So if you want to see a movie where girls get naked, there are lots of famous people and I (actually me this time, no cheap knockoff or stunt double, kick a door down), this is definitely for you. Even Donnie liked it.

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